Angry Puppy

Thrill! As we review Alan Ball’s new vampire series True Blood.

Cower! Before our new favorite anime series Death Note.

See! More homicide and mayhem in Asylum, Shrooms and the second season of Dexter on DVD.

Find! Considerably less manslaughter in our inappropriately scheduled reviews of WiiFit and My Scoopbox.

Plus! (wait, that’s not a verb) The Middleman, Primeval and an all new Mystery Geek Challenge.

Let’s go there now.

In response to our Birds of Prey review in Episode 33, viewer Megh commented:

“…Lucius’s throwaway line “Should do fine against cats” has got my little fan brain spinning, hoping for not only Catwoman in the next (fingers crossed) film, but also Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy as the main baddies. I think the Nolan franchise needs a little girl power.”

It looks like she’s not the only one feeling that way. Australian artist Josh McMahon [via io9] created some poster mockups for his idealized third-film cast. Click through to see not only Marion Cotillard and Kristen Bell as Catwoman and Harley Quinn, but also David Tennant as The Riddler.

You can make a career out of wearing pinstripe suits, and I, for one, am glad to see Tennant getting away with it.

But, the best rumor I’ve heard is that Chris Nolan wants…

[Wait for it... And...]

…Cher to play Catwoman [UK Telegraph via ComicBookMovie.com]. My sources (made up of my common sense, Kodos and some Nescafé) say “no”.

I know that a lot of gay geeks have a preternatural, instinctive repulsion for gay-icon pop divas. I know that some of you younger readers are thinking “Cher Who?” And I know that even the Cher fans are thinking that she might be a little too close to Christmas in a May/December romance with Christian Bale. But I hope that both you and my sources are wrong. As silly as it sounds, I think this would be a fun interpretation of the character.

The article quotes an unnamed “studio executive” as saying:

“Cher is Nolan’s first choice to play Catwoman. He wants to [sic] her to portray her like a vamp in her twilight years. [...] The new Catwoman will be the absolute opposite of Michelle Pfeiffer and Halle Berry’s purring creations.”

The Michelle Pfeiffer (hot) and the Halle Berry (not) Catwomen were completely different, so calling this interpretation the “opposite” of that is essentially meaningless. But I’m all for it if they mean:

Opposite of Michelle Pfeiffer: older, more stable, more of a mastermind than a fighter
Opposite of Halle Berry: watchable

I do have one suggestion. If they’re going for an older, vampy Catwoman, why not go to the “unretouched & unretired” master, Julie Newmar? We hear she’s available.

In this witchy edition of Angry Puppy:

• Doctor Who: “The Stolen Earth” and “Journey’s End”
• Stuff We Watch: Primeval, Spaced, Birds of Prey, Eureka
• Stuff We Play: System of a Down on Rock Band
• Reviews: Shutter, High Tension
• Stuff We Read: Reignbow and Dee-va, Pride High, Hunters of Dune
• Plus: Our 15 Favorite Witches (look for the full list tomorrow)

I came across the game Escape from Rehab on Kotaku and thought I’d share it with you fun kids. I swear that I had no intention of bringing up Willow (again), but look what happened!

Lee: “Oh, fun! Someone made a Flash game in which Amy Winehouse must battle her way out of rehab! Haha, oh lulz, she uses drugs as her weapons. And she’s…fighting Batman? And Iron Man…and Hellboy? (Wait. What?)”

Internet: “Pssst… It’s a promotion for Disaster Movie.”

Lee: “You mean that franchise with all the random pop culture non sequiturs that stopped being funny after Scary Movie 2?”

Internet: “Yeah, that’s it. But Scary Movie 3 was decent, no? Anyway, shut up a minute. You know, you can kill at least another quarter of an hour by reading the comments on this post. Look! There’s one about a spoof of these spoofs called Vague Genre Movie.  Let’s watch?”

Lee: “No, really, I have things to d…”

Lee: “Hey, that’s Willow at the one minute mark! I mean, Alyson Hannigan. Is that a scene from Date Movie? Why, oh, why, cruel Internet, have you reminded me of her filmography just as I was coming to terms with it?”

In conclusion, I’ll be over here re-watching Buffy Season 6 now. Oh, and that Amy Winehouse game sucks ballz.

I’m sure all of you have seen the fake script for Michael Bay’s The Dark Knight. If not, read it here.

Now some enterprising soul has created a mocku-trailer (see what I just did there?) for Michael Bay’s A Nightmare on Elm Street.

I don’t know. Needs more explosions and bikini babes to capture that authentic Krueger experience.

The big difference between this clip and the script for Bay’s The Dark Knight is that Michael Bay’s production company Platinum Dunes is actually remaking A Nightmare on Elm Street, along with Friday the 13th, The Birds and a few others.

The worst part is that I feel compelled to watch them all.

[Via /Film]