Angry Puppy

Critics love bashing sci fi and horror films.

I don’t know what that’s about, but reviewers of these films often sound angry for being subjected to something clearly beneath them, as though they can’t just sit back like the rest of us and enjoy watching people getting chopped up or eaten by aliens.

While the best sci fi and horror movies do offer redeeming qualities like original ideas or social commentary, part of the fun of these genres is watching the glorious chaos unfold. You’ll notice that our list is made up only of sci fi and comic book films. We excluded horror, because, let’s face it, practically all horror films get bad reviews, giving them all an even playing field.

It’s therefore unsurprising that many genre films develop a bad reputation. Sometimes audiences latch on to bad reviews, and the situation snowballs until movie titles become punchlines like Waterworld and Battlefield Earth. While I’m the first to recommend against either of the aforementioned movies (except of course as hilarious unintentional comedy), several similarly categorized films deserve better.

So check out these ten movies. Disagree? Did we miss any titles? As always we want to know what you think. Give us a shout below and let us know what we’re missing.

#10 - AVP: Alien vs. Predator
While I’m not sure what the turn-off was for a lot of these films, it’s pretty clear with AVP. Alien fans went in with high expectations, but were met with an admittedly sluggish first 20 minutes or so. But give this film a shot beyond the set-up. Once it gets going, it’s awfully fun to watch. The storyline is fairly inventive, the film successfully presents interesting back stories and motivations for both sides of the conflict, and the effects and overall production look great too. The jury’s still out on the similarly maligned sequel (translation: I haven’t seen it yet but will let you know as soon as I do!).

#9 - Underworld
Am I a sucker for Scott Speedman? Possibly. Am I too easily excited by the idea of a movie with both vampires and werewolves? Probably. Do I really enjoy random omnipresent blue-filtered lighting? Well, not especially, but it does kind of look cool and seems to work for crazy goth hybrids in black leather tights. And really if you’re searching for great art in a movie about werewolves battling vampires, you’re probably watching the wrong film (though I’m sure if you wait long enough Judy Dench will star in a highbrow remake). In the meantime, you can enjoy this silly, sexy piece of fun!

#8 - Southland Tales
In all fairness, this was a bit of a mess, but there’s so much going on in this film to like that I’m willing to overlook the less tasty parts like so many bruises on a delicious pear. The juiciest bite of this awkward metaphor goes to Ms. Sarah Michelle Gellar as a celebrity porn star with her own brand of bottled water. Her delivery is as impeccable as her awesomely bizarre character, who joins several other awesomely bizarre characters in a wild, semi-coherent, expensive free-for-all from the creator of Donnie Darko. There’s so much humor, comedy, action, innovation, unexpected celebrity appearances, and great ideas going on in this film that I’m looking forward to seeing it again just to catch all the things I missed the first time through.

#7 - Hulk
It’s easy to think of this as the very expensive silly project between Ang Lee’s critically acclaimed The Ice Storm and critically and gay acclaimed Brokeback Mountain, but it’s not really a fair comparison given the nature of his bookending films. Yes, Hulk is cartoonish. In fact, Lee brilliantly set up his visuals to achieve the look of a comic book come to life. The most distracting element is the complete absence of any serious problems at all. I spent half the film trying to figure out why I was supposed to not like it.

#6 - Gattaca
This little dystopia set in the “not too distant future” is different from the others on the list in that theater-goers (or, rather, no-goers) shunned it despite positive reviews from usually cantankerous critics. Perhaps it was too cerebral for sci fi/action fans and too sci fi for cinéastes, but when a film sets out to explore the consequences of reproductive technologies and contemporary society’s creeping tendency toward “new eugenics”, it’s difficult to incorporate too many car chases or scenes featuring stripper poles. If nothing else, what other sci fi movie has Ethan Hawke, Jude Law and Gore Vidal?

#5 - Tank Girl
John Waters’ longtime producer loved the comic so much that she directed the film that turned out to be a passion play for a number of the people involved. Lori Petty, Ice-T, a young Naomi Watts and ubiquitous professional supervillain Malcolm McDowell are the leads in this very weird and loud adaptation of the UK comic strip that once was part of the anti-Thatcher counterculture and led to the creation of lesbian Tank Girl nights in London. The film was largely panned or ignored, but this girl-power gem should stay on your radar. It’s oodles of outrageous action fun.

#4 - Aeon Flux
We love the original animated series, but it doesn’t mean we don’t also have room in our hearts for the flesh and bone version. Charlize Theron pulls off the moves, or at least as well as anyone can whose body didn’t spring from an imaginative artist’s pen. The film’s plot and characters are creative and original, and the effects are both beautiful and cool. Though the story is far less ambiguous than its animated progenitor, it’s still clever enough to keep you guessing and wraps up with a more than satisfying ending. Netflix this puppy the next time you’re craving a really good sci fi film and you won’t be sorry. Happy snacking!

#3 - Starship Troopers
Polarizing films like Troopers are tough to recommend, because you’re either going to be totally into it or you’re totally not. Reactions may be related to the equally polarizing source material, the Robert Heinlein novel which has been accused of being fascist, militaristic and even racist. I always saw this film as an intentionally over-the-top attempt at exploring all of these themes. Granted, director Paul Verhoeven had just given the world Showgirls, so I can’t fault anyone for doubting the possibility that he was being intentionally excessive. But certain moments belie the film’s parodic intentions: Neil Patrick Harris as the spooky military scientist, Rue McClanahan as the blind biology teacher, the ridiculously stunning cast of young military hotties. Then there’s my favorite moment. Giant bug aliens just destroyed South America, killing millions of people including your parents. What are a bunch of hot military heroes to do? Let’s all get kick-ass tattoos!!

#2 - Hudson Hawk
How does one explain this? Bruce Willis and Danny Aiello are crooks from Hoboken recruited by megapowerful and wealthy duo Sandra Bernhard and Richard E. Grant to retrieve pieces of a secret Leonardo Da Vinci alchemical invention so they and their evil global corporation can take over the world. (Takes breath.) The numerous agencies at play include violent CIA agents named after candy bars (played by David Caruso and James Coburn) and the Vatican’s espionage unit (represented by spy/nun Andie MacDowell). Apart from making more sense and being a thousand times better than any episode of Alias (Seasons three through five), this is one of my all-time favorite entertaining train wrecks. That’s train wreck in a good way, not, you know, in a Gigli way. Some highlights: Willis and Aiello periodically bursting into song, Sandra Bernhard’s evil dog, the single greatest monologue of Richard E. Grant’s career and all my favorite geek romance line. Did I mention that David Caruso’s character is named Kit Kat?

#1 - Alien 3
Where many of the films on this list are high in entertainment value, Alien 3 best represents a truly great film that’s been unfairly bashed or ignored. The third film in the Alien series probably suffers the most from comparison to its predecessors, which doesn’t seem fair since all three films represent different genres. Where the original Alien was a horror film, and the second was a fantastic action film, Alien 3 feels more to me like great drama, albeit drama with things that messily explode out of other things. Because of her prior adventures, we’ve by now developed a considerable fondness for Ripley, and this movie is more about the end of her journey than it is about the ongoing Alien storyline. I love the handling of the Ripster, and the prisoners are a welcome change from the idiot marines that surrounded her last time around. Don’t get me wrong, the first two Alien films are among my all-time favorites, but where those films were very loud and awesome blunt instruments, this one is the shiny awesome scalpel.

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