Top Ten Geek Bands

The dual challenge facing us with this list was to identify the greatest geek bands of all time and, perhaps more importantly, to present some kind of definition as to what, exactly, defines a geek band.

To us a geek band is one whose lyrics, music or character is funny (not necessarily light) or witty. It’s a band that plays with language and surprises us with clever twists. And perhaps most importantly, geek bands don’t care if we think they’re cool. They’re just doing their thing and making their obscure references and jokes. We may or may not get what they’re doing, but they don’t care; they know the right fans are smart enough to get it.

We had to get help for this potentially controversial list, so we polled a diverse assortment of geeks, gay and straight, boys n girls, and together we came up with this list of the awesomest geek bands.

#10 - Suzanne Vega
When we hear Suzanne Vega, we’re flashing back to high school days spent hanging out in the art room and backstage at the theater, so maybe that’s the geek connection. From Marlena on the Wall to Tom’s Diner, through the Blood-Makes-Noise years and lately back to urban folk, Suzanne Vega has always leaned toward the geek side.

#9 - Ben Folds Five
Ben Folds as a solo artist deserves a runner up position, but it was with Ben Folds Five that he cranked out his geekiest tunes. We especially love Song For The Dumped, Battle of Who Could Care Less, the hilarious song Underground, and best of all the bizarre jam titled For Those of Ya’ll Who Wear Fanny Packs, where the guys make complete idiots out of themselves for our entertainment.

#8 - Devo
Well… duh.

#7 - Tori Amos
Her music is more quirky than witty. Her lyrics tell odd little stories that we don’t always understand. She doesn’t care, she’s hanging out with Neil Gaiman and dropping subtle references to him in all her albums. She was Neil’s inspiration for Delirium, one of our favorite characters in the Sandman series. And we’re not alone! Geek magazine recently dubbed Tori the “Nerd Queen” and gave her a two-page spread, extolling her many geek qualities.

#6 - They Might Be Giants
Nobody does offbeat lyrics quite like They Might Be Giants, or TMBG to their scores of geek fans. Pick up any album for their surreal vision of the world in songs like Particle Man, Birdhouse in Your Soul, and Kiss Me Son of God. Their earliest songs offered up some of the oddest material. Look up the lyrics to Ana Ng to see what we mean, or consider this line from the song’s climax: “When I was driving once I saw this painted on a bridge: I don’t want the world, I just want your half.”

#5 - The Ditty Bops
You might not be familiar with this relatively new band, and we couldn’t be more excited to include this lesbian band on the list. To really experience the full geekiness of the duo you have to see their shows, which involve props, costumes, skits and slide shows.  In 2007 the couple toured the US playing venues from LA to New York, and traveled the entire distance on bicycles. For a great introduction to their glorious and sexy geekiness, check out the video for Wishful Thinking, whose lyrics are wonderfully dark and twisted.

#4 - Atom & His Package
aka Adam Goren, who no longer tours under the name of his former synth punk band. Atom & His Package served up ultra-geeky fun songs about everyday things like what the Jews are really up to on Christmas, dating a girl who’s just a head, and trying to impress Enya by working out (Pumping Iron for Enya). In the loving tribute Hats Off to Halford, Atom salutes Judas Priest’s frontman’s coming out and tells us “statistics say chances of being gay are what one in ten / that means there is a 40 percent chance that one of the guys in Pantera likes men.” Well we’re not sure about his math but at the end of the day you can’t argue with a guy who writes songs with titles like Lord It’s Hard to Be Happy When You’re Not Using the Metric System and I’m Downright Amazed at What I Can Destroy with Just a Hammer.

#3 - Talking Heads
“There’s a party in my mind, and I hope it never stops.” Thus go the lyrics of Memories Can’t Wait, another in a series of weird musings from the folks that brought you Psycho Killer, Life During Wartime, the lawn suit, and True Stories, the 1986 Talking Heads film starring John Goodman, Jon Waters regular Swoosie Kurtz, and the late Spalding Gray. Sound interesting? Consider this tribute: one of today’s biggest geek bands took their name from a song on the film soundtrack titled, ‘Radio Head’. Guess which one.  Go on, we dare you.

#2 - Rush
Uhhh… do we actually have to explain this one? If you’re not sure why Rush is here then you may not be a geek, or at least may not be a geek from the 70s and 80s. Because Rush was always the giveaway that triggered our Geekdar. Their music is fueled by sci fi and fantasy themes and aesthetics - one glance at any of their album covers and you’ll get the picture. Lyrics draw on references to Rivendell, The Twilight Zone, and Xanadu (the poem, not the movie turned Broadway musical).

#1 - Queen
Not just because of the glorious Flash Gordon soundtrack. Not just because of the awesome theme to Highlander. Not just because of the bizarre operatic chart-busting Bohemian Rhapsody, which we’ll forever associate with geek classic Wayne’s World. And, awesome as it is, not just because the front man is a gay dude, although frankly we love that too. Queen is as funny and witty as they come (I’m In Love With My Car anyone?), and though it’s hard to match Freddie’s cool, it was a magical, effortless cool.

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